“Happy birthday, my man!”

Femi said as he clinked his glass with mine. “Smile for the camera!” He
said as he grinned into the camera. I smiled faintly and the flash from the camera came into our eyes.
Femi dropped his glass. “It’s time to party. The guys are waiting for us downstairs.”

He said pulling me up.
“I…I just want to work.” I replied as I stared at my laptop. “You guys can go ahead.”

Femi stared at me as though I had just revealed some horrible secret about myself.

“Don’t give me that look, Femi.” I said, cutting off the awkwardness of his stare.

Femi hissed. “George, I don’t get it. It is your birthday.”

“Not an off day.” I replied as I adjusted in my seat. “Besides, if I don’t have these drafts ready before Monday, we won’t have a good case in court.” I added with a smile.

Femi was not having any of that. He turned away and started to type on his phone. He then turned in my direction. “I have taken care of it.” He said.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

Femi shrugged. “The litigation officer would be here to handle the necessary drafting for you.” He said. “The ladies are waiting.”

Ladies! The perfectly crafted species by the Almighty, enough to make the heart of a man stop momentarily. Every woman, beautiful and appealing in her own way to all men…but not to me.

Femi sighed. “I know you are not a big fan of women and booze, but, it is your birthday and it is a Friday night, so we are going to spend it in the club. You are free to hook up or not, but you won’t spend it here.”He said, and picked my phone from the table. “I know you can’t do without this guy here.” He said staring at my phone.

He was right. My phone was my mobile office. Femi might have his way by dragging me with him to the club, but he won’t be able to stop me working with my phone in my hand.

“Follow me.” He said, stretching the phone out at me.
With that, I followed him.

The club pulsed with excitement. I knew it was not my environment. Dark lights, clinging bodies, and noise. Not music. Noise. I covered my ears as I walked in with Femi.

“George!!! The man!!!” Jude, a colleague of ours shouted from the corner. Femi led me through the crowd over to their seat. “The man is here!”He announced.

“Happy Birthday!!!” They shouted.

I smiled and lifted my hand to wave. The others burst into what I could guess was a mocking laugh. I dropped the hand slowly.

Femi nudged me with a smile. “Dude, what is that? A wave? Hug your buddies, man.”

I shrugged as the guys came over to ‘hug’ me. It was more of a shoulder hug…then, the ladies followed. They hugged.
“We want you to set the floor open.” Femi said, shouting at the top of his voice because of the noise.

I stared at him. “The club is already grooving.” I said. Femi made a gesture to his ear and I had to shout.

Femi smiled at this and handed me a bottle of champagne. “Pop it!”
I shook the bottle and flicked the cork.

“Party starts now!” Femi cheered as he went to the dance floor with a lady. The other guys followed suit and I was left standing alone. That, to a reasonable extent made me happy as I settled into a chair and
pulled out my phone.

I looked around and watched. Girls sitting together drinking. Couples dancing. Everyone with their own activity stood out. I was sitting and watching too. That should pass for something, right? But just
when I thought I was distinct in my activity, my eyes caught the most beautiful sight. It was pure, it was a smile. It was beautiful. It was a woman. I swallowed as I watched her approach me. Did I know her?
Why was she smiling in my direction? I didn’t smile back.

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She stopped at the table before mine and joined the girls who were in a group. I watched her from my seat as she conversed with the other girls. She laughed the loudest. She laughed so freely. No holds. No
boundaries. I couldn’t take my eyes away for a second, I was not ready to miss a thing about her…at least, what I could observe.

She then turned in my direction with a smile. And then, she rose to her feet, and she came to me. My heart did stop for a second. “I am hitting on you.” She said.

I stared at her and then the smile came effortlessly from me. “Seriously?”

“My friends are going to pay me twenty thousand Naira if I get your name.” she said.

I smiled and cast a glance at her group of friends who didn’t seem to be looking at us. “Are you sure?” I asked.

She nodded. “What is your name?”

“George.” I replied. She raised an eyebrow as though she was expecting me to complete the statement. So, I obliged. “George Ade.”

She then took a seat. “So, who dragged you down here, George?”
“Is it that obvious?” I asked.
She nodded. “It is.”
“It is my birthday, my friends thought I could have a little fun.” I

She gaped and then laughed. “This is really fun, George! You sitting all by yourself seems like fun to me.” She mocked.
“What is your name?” I asked.
She smiled. “Do you really need it? Or do you want it because I asked for yours?”
I paused to think about her question. I wanted her name and I really didn’t know why. “I don’t know why.” I replied, honestly.
“I know why. You like me.” She replied. “Thanks for the conversation.
There is no twenty thousand. Smile some more, it looks good on you.”
She said and rose to her feet.
I reached for her hand. “Are you going to leave me this way?”
She nodded with a smile. “I just did.” She said and walked away.
I smiled as I watched her leave. Something in me lit up. I lit up.

Story by Tomi Adesina . She is a screenwriter and fiction series blogger.

Read Our New Series: All Fun And Games Guide
Choose your Reaction!
      • I’ve tried it a few times. It doesn’t always end as expected but it feels so good to control the moment.

  • why do people go out to get drunk during their birthdays? wakunywe tu maziwa mala na queen cakes

  • Interesting story.. Looking forward to more

  • Is there more to the story ama imeisha hapo

  • Who is celebrating his birthday this year.? . .2020 is null and void

  • Mala and queen cakes are the way to go 😂😂😂😂
    Yeah right!!
    Lakini kuwachwa hanging hivo😭😭

  • @adoyo-obonyo never seat below a tv in a club because your eye contact game can be pretty confusing……. I once sat below a tv in a club and from a far I locked eyes with a dame and since I was C2H5OH infused I could swear she was looking at me,so this nigga pounced, only for the dame to claim ofcourse it might seem that am looking at you….”what do you expect if ur seated below a tv” .it was such a classy reject that nowadays i take caution far away from tvs is where you find me…

      • But the lady is seated far of so eye view narrows ….so she is almost seated up straight

  • What a read
    Especially the last bit…was really anticipating the killer pick up line

  • Sometime back there was once an MTV rave in Carnivore(Simba saloon).I started drinking brandy in the local with friends. I got so high I blacked out outside before getting in.since we got there in cab and i had blacked out, my friends put me under one of the shrubs usually in the parking(hiding me),removed my shoes( so that they couldn’t be stolen),took my phone and money(they drank all my money bloody bastards!!!!) They got in the rave with them..Those were the fun days.. wonder if they would still do the same thing now (thinking emoji 🙂
    Imagine waking up underneath a bush with no shoes,money or a phone……Pressure I tell you

  • OOH SHIT……..

    I work with a very diverse group of people in terms of nationality so craziness varies in different levels plus we are chefs so in terms of afterwork binge drinking and waking up the next morning for a breakfast set up is but a normal thing that being said,so we hit the club after work on a Friday and upon entry of the club the hostess were offering chocolates….. So fast forward to the night of pinting up i “keiod” on the lobby…..”maji ilizidii unga”.so the arseholes slip in a chocolate in between my butt crack and drop me off my bed and tuck me in nicely like good friends they were.Next morning waking up late rushing out for work in the same clothes mid way thru my trip to work feeling a sense of smoothness between the ngong hills (OOH SHIT) …..Then the fact I didn’t realize it happened (OOOH SHIT)….Reaching to the loo it’s black (OOOH SHIT)…….Calling ur boy up telling him why he needs to cover ur “ass” at work ,him laughing his “ass off” then finally tells you what they did …..Then you being like NO SHIT

        • A whole lot on another level

          • There was one that involved cracking egg yorks inside someone’s shoe,works so well because when you put ur shoe on you won’t realize it cause the egg white sticks with shoe and the York remains solid intact in the shoe it’s only after ur removing the shoe you realize something is off

  • They pulled your pants down, spread your cheeks and placed chocolate in there?

    • Nope… just that small window of opportunity we guys sometimes forget and show our buttcrack…..

  • Wueee the story is so bomb! Imeniacha na hangovers

  • Well very short story…it was my first time drinking on my birthday and lets just say everyone woke up 6 of us in one bed

  • Okay so this George guy is either handsome or has a good smile!!!!!!the lady is such a teaser daaamn!!!!could it please continue????i feel like George will start going out more

  • So my most embarrassing night out was my first day drinking in campus!!!!
    So some rugby players invited my roommate and i for drinks & since I don’t smoke weed they asked me do you drink i say “yeah i like vodka”
    Note:i had never put alcohol in my mouth before (wanna look

  • For risk of this coming back to bite my ass

  • The story has me painting an image of the girl and how she would look in real life…the writer should finish so we know what happened

  • The writer was supposed to finish but that guy is me during concerts

  • I loved that the ending was not clich’e.

  • I’m I the only one who is craving for more……aki nimebaki hanging.

    Mimi I shot my shot to a guy I had a crush on

  • I think at times pis it’s good kujistua kiasi I.e try out something new that you’ve never done before. Shoot that shot if possible…,let it be a way of also boosting your confidence.

    For those who’ve met me know how shy I really am but I realized I am missing out on quite a lot so at the start of this year,plan ilikuwa working on myself and ooh well we’re halfway through and this babe is just happy with everything that’s happened in her life so far.

    So give that which you think you can’t do a shot then you’ll be surprised with how it turns out. Also allow your friends to help you whenever you get stuck.

    Enjoy life whenever you have a chance to,tomorrow ain’t promised honey!

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